robs glazer go home tour 2005

hey

im gonna put some photos on in about two minutes. They are of Beijing, Halloween at school and some of a sports day at the biggest middle school in China. (so they say)

Everythings cool here, literally.  The weather had turned and even i will be digging out my long john silvers soon to keep the old baby maker protected from the frost.  Work is ticking along, once you get in the swing of things the weeks fly by.  Tonight I have parent teacher interviews.  I get to tell the parents what a Rtard their kid is, so im looking forward to it.  More soon.

So I havent written on here for a while.  I apologise to the one or two avid readers.  Ive just got back to Daqing after a short holiday to Beijing.  A good time was had by all.  It was more R and R than touristy stuff going on.  In fact we only went to Tianenmen Square, on National day as well, which was a fricking busy place.  Its the second time I have been to the largest square in the world, and yet again I failed to get run over by a tank.  Just lucky I suppose.  Many will be shocked to find out that I spent most of the holiday in and around drinking establishments.  Researching.

On the train back every time i nodded off, the little girl near me would start kicking me in her sleep.  What a bitch.  So i got around 20 minutes shut eye on a 13 hour train journey!  Today i am back teaching, and im pretty tired.  The lessons won't win any prizes.  Im also pissled off that its international week for football so there is no united to watch!  Who cares about England anyway? 

Okay I will put some pictures on as soon as I can be bothered.

laters

I have just finished teaching for the day and tomorrow is the day off.  So i am happy.  Maybe a little tired as well.  Tonight we are making a special trip to the other side of town to go to the only nightclub in the city.  Its been over 11 weeks since i have ventured to a nightclub.  Please remember that nightclub was in Rochdale.  Unless I get arrested, i will tell the tales on here in a few days.  Im still trying my hardest to get someone to clean my apartment but im having no luck!  Its a farce!  Obviously im not offering money for this privelidge nor free english lessons.

Teaching is going well.  We have had a daughter of a friend of the boss watching us the last couple of weeks.  She is interested in hanging around foreigners.  So far i have managed to get her doing my lesson plans which is a great help.  Who knows how far i can push it.  Next week will be the end of my three month probation, so if i get sacked i'll be home soon.  Yeh right.  One of the other teachers has just come back from scotland after a short holiday home.  He has been reminding me of the weather and expensive beer, to my disgust.  Why dont i stay here and live well?

More photos coming soon..... if i dont lose my camera tonight.

laters

This is the day after my birthday and i am a little tender.  The birthday fell on my only day off which was a turn up for the books.  Some good friends and I went out in the afternoon for a hot pot with our chinese birds in tow.  It was a lovely meal, nice and spicy.  I have a chinese girlfriend at the moment and she bought me a t shirt which was nice of her and a girl at work bought me an electric razor. They really dont dig the designer stubble/bumfluff out here.  So anyway after the meal we bought a couple of bottles of nasty chinese red wine and watched dodgeball on dvd.  Then we went to the foreigners bar, where they had arranged a surprise shin dig.  There was a massive cake and loads of birds and booze.  They sang happy birsday and once i'd blown the 5 candles out, a cake fight ensued with the targets being all the girls.  They loved it.  And here i am the day after feeling a little blurry, but I taught my 4 hours today with energy so no-one cares.  Today is also pay day, so im loaded again.  I couldnt even spend last months money so i can save a bit.  Im going to buy a chinese chess set so i can go and play with the local oldies in the park.

There was another incident the other day.  I was having a really good dream and then woke up, looked around, and i was still in the bar, it was 9 am!  Who knows what happened but the tab was a fair bit, and there was a bottle of jack danni and wodka missing.  i'd been drinking with a couple of aussies, one of whom is now off alcohol, the other, ex special forces who can drink shed loads.  What doesnt kill you makes you stronger, all part of lifes rich tapestry etc etc.  I will put photos on soon i promise.  o h yeh because it was my birthday every one who clicks to this site will automatically agree to pay me 10 pounds via paypal. always read the small print.

laters 

Due to the immense amount of pressure being piled on me to restart the blog, here it is.  Now you two out there better be happy.

Ive been here in Daqing for 6 weeks and one day now and i am still enjoying myself.  I think that may have something to do with the world cup running alongside every evening, only shown in bars of course.  Work is going well, I start the summer school session next week and will have 30 hours of teaching a week.  That will go on for 6 weeks before it reduces a bit.  I have a class of 4-5 yr olds who havent even started chinese school yet.  They are funny, always burping and playing with their willys.  Not mine, let me make that clear!

Last night whilst waiting in the bar for the final, which started at 2am, a group of 20 Russian girls came in.  They are on a trip from Vladivostok university, and obviously me and the other single westerner made them very welcome.  (in ruski accent "oh you must be very well qualified to be an english teacher?" er no. "well we think you are very handsome and successfull"  well who am i to argue with spetznatz agents?)

Sooo to cut a long story with no meaningful point short, Im going out to meet a Russian right about..

now

 

Hello again.  I am now in China again, where I have taken a job teaching English.  Im up in the North east in a city called Daqing.  Its an oil city and it has loads of pumps, called Kow Tows, dotted around the city. Ive been here for a week now and have been getting aquinted with the local amneties.  Its cheap as chips to eat and drink, the food is varied and good.  Its pretty warm here at the moment about thirty degrees but it gets hella cold in the winter
ive just done something to my keyboard so that i cant punctuate but ill carry on!
yeh im starting teaching tomorrow in a local school   there is sixty in a class!  should be fun
everyone is getting ready for the world cup which will be played at night time over here and the boss of my school has entered me and some other staff in to a five a side competition that will go on throughout the world cup  after every game you get taken out for a nice meal and plenty of booze   so to get fit by three days time im gonna run up and down the flights of stairs in my tower  im on the twelth floor

ive gotta try and fix whatever ive done to this keyboard

As the title cryptically suggests, i have now returned to the utopia that is Rochdale, England.  Its good fun here what with the rain and general coldness.  It is for these reasons that i have been forced to start a new charity.  Loosely based on Red Nose Day, Big Nose Holiday, will enable a needy traveller to desert the country of his birth for one final time, to enjoy different cultures, to fall unconscious in to a warm ocean and to get hassled by lady boys.  Send money now to www.robwantsyourmoneyforhisowngood.com

Whatever you can give will be appreciated and spent in a way that will completely horrify you.  Gods bless you.